Picture this. Your name is read out, people clap, and your manager says kind things about the project you led. You smile and say thank you. Inside, a quiet voice says they have no idea how close it came to falling apart, and that next time you will not be so lucky.
If you know that voice, you are in very good company. It often visits people who are thoughtful, capable and conscientious.
What imposter syndrome is and is not
Imposter syndrome is not a medical diagnosis. It is a name for a common experience: feeling like a fraud in spite of clear evidence that you are good at what you do. People who have it put their successes down to luck, timing or other people's kindness, and take their mistakes as proof of what they feared all along.
It can get stronger as you move up, not weaker. Each promotion brings more people watching and more to lose. It is also often described by people who are the first in their family to go to university or to hold a senior job, and among anyone who has often been the only person like them in the room. Many South Africans will recognise that.
It is seldom a gap in knowledge. More study and more certificates rarely make it go away, because the problem is usually not in what you know. It may have more to do with how safe you feel.
A brain that is always on guard
Somewhere along the way, often quite early in life, many people learn that approval depends on getting things right. The brain may draw a simple conclusion: mistakes are dangerous, so watch for them all the time.
The result can be a state often called hyper-vigilance, which means being constantly on the lookout for threat.
There is also the voice itself. When your mind is not occupied with a task, a set of brain areas called the default mode network becomes active. It is linked to daydreaming and thinking about yourself. In an anxious mind, thoughts can get stuck going over the same worries again and again, which is called rumination.
The fear of being found out is rarely about what you know. It is about how safe you feel.
What it costs you
- Over-preparing for everything, then feeling relief instead of pride
- Checking and re-checking work that was already good
- Finding it hard to accept a compliment
- Putting off tasks because they must be perfect
- Staying quiet in meetings in case you say something foolish
- Deep tiredness that a holiday does not fix
The tiredness is real. Keeping watch all day is wearing. Over months and years, this pattern can slide into anxiety or burnout, which is one reason it deserves attention and not just a brave face.
How neurofeedback may help
Neurofeedback is a non-invasive form of brain training that aims to help the nervous system settle. Sensors on the scalp read your brain's electrical activity. A computer gives your brain feedback through sound and picture when it moves towards calmer, more balanced patterns. The sensors only read. Nothing is sent into the brain.
Each client at our Krugersdorp practice starts with a 19-channel brain map, which takes about an hour and a half. The map is used to plan training.
Training aims to help the brain spend more time in a settled state and to return to it more quickly after stress. Imposter feelings themselves have not been studied much in neurofeedback research, so the evidence is limited, and results vary from one person to the next. What it may do is lower the background alarm so that good things have a chance to sink in.
Our what to expect page describes the brain map and the sessions that follow, each of which starts with a short check-in.
Things that help alongside brain training
- Say it out loud. Tell someone you trust. You may well hear "me too", and shame often shrinks when it is shared.
- Keep the evidence. Save kind emails and write down what went well each week. Read it when the voice gets loud.
- Notice the thought as a thought. "I am having the thought that I am not good enough" is different from "I am not good enough".
Talking to a psychologist or counsellor can be very valuable, and it can sit side by side with neurofeedback. Please see your GP or a psychologist if the self-doubt comes with persistent low mood, panic, hopelessness or thoughts of harming yourself. Those need proper professional care, and brain training is a complement to that, not a substitute.
You may also recognise yourself in our articles on high-functioning anxiety and on the constant background hum of worry.
Common questions
Is imposter syndrome a mental illness?
No. It is a common pattern of thinking and feeling, not a diagnosis. Many capable people experience it at some point, especially after a promotion or a big change. It becomes a concern when it causes ongoing anxiety, exhaustion or avoidance, and at that stage it is worth speaking to a psychologist or your GP.
Why does success not make the feeling go away?
Because the feeling does not seem to come from a lack of achievement. It may come from a nervous system that has learned to stay on guard. Each success brings brief relief and then a higher bar to clear. Change is more likely to come from feeling safer than from collecting more proof.
Can neurofeedback stop my inner critic?
It is unlikely to silence it completely, and nobody can promise that. What neurofeedback aims to do is calm the over-alert state that feeds the critic, so that the voice may be quieter and easier to step back from. It can be used together with counselling. Results differ between individuals.
You have worked hard for where you are. It would be good to be able to enjoy it. If you would like to talk about whether neurofeedback might help, please get in touch with Irine to ask questions or book.
- imposter syndrome
- hypervigilance
- confidence
- executive coaching
- anxiety
